Jan 4, 2017

Self-Improvement & Support

I had so much I wanted to do in December and didn't so I ended the year feeling a little weird - upset I didn't finish things, but happy to hang out with family. And really, as a year, 2016, personally, wasn't all that bad.

I couldn't keep up with my resolutions. I had all these daily allotments for working out, reading, writing, learning...I quickly realized I didn't have enough time. Meeting my goals took at least 2 hr a day. And that's impractical when you have a 9-5 with an hour commute.

But I did have a theme for the year, self-improvement, that I kept to. I did a lot of things to help me get better at a variety of things - networking at BookCon, participating in #PitMad, leading workshops for the Writing Journey, learning new skills that got me the first 9-5 job I'm happy with, and I figured out how to market me to build up freelance income.

Granted, my GR reading challenge and personal attempt to read around the world? Failed.

This last year, with it's focus on self, also made me re-evaluate whom I identify with and how I label myself. I've spent several months embracing the idea of not being straight, coming out to people slowly and in different manners, and getting miffed at slights and stereotypes from people just not understanding when I  explain the ace spectrum. Most people in the world have never heard the word asexual, let alone demisexual. Some refuse to admit it's real. Other think it's so foreign, such a dividing line, I'm classified as an 'other' to avoid.

(Dating, inevitably, has been hard.)

Now I like advocating for those on the spectrum, answering questions and educating people. Seeking out media. I told all my friends when a book series I love added an ace character. In Stars, I'm officially making Trilutha ace. Which can present problems as she's a child bride...

But the whole process of my 'make a better me year' made me realize:
  1. My support network is so much bigger than I thought 
  2. I underestimated how easily friends, and even acquaintances, would accept a new facet of me
  3. I stressed about each and every one of these conversations, but didn't need to
  4. I would have gotten no where without my support network in all things, be it my identification or my efforts to grow
And so that's going to be my theme for this year, supporting others. I've been really bad, despite being an indie author, in supporting that industry. So I'm gonna write down the titles of writers I follow, read their stuff, and review. I'm gonna host more workshops and help people, taking on more Journey projects. Even at work, I want to automate processes for some of my co-workers once I learn VBA better. Plus, I think I'm gonna be more vocal about causes to show support for my values. There's a women's march for the inauguration...

Here's to a new year!


  1. It sounds overall that your year of self was positive. It's always hard to challenge the way people see you, but your friends love you for being you, and that makes me so happy for you :-)

  2. Aw, thanks. It has been a bit of a year, but mostly good. Here's to pushing that momentum forward!