Apr 13, 2012

Manly Emotion

I don't remember where (otherwise I'd post a link), but on a blog recently there was talk about writing characters of the opposite gender.

Which got me thinking, I've written 1st POV from a MMC before, but have I gotten it right?

The hardest thing I find write about guys is when they show emotion. I mean, I know they feel, they're human, but most of my literary (and film!) references don't show crying or frustrated deconstructions of rooms. Kay, I've seen the later, but it was a comedy, so I'm counting it as not really real cuz it was done for laughs. I mean, it's very common to see women cry in films, and I'd assume that men cry in real life, but I've never really seen it myself (out and about or in media).

So, you manly men out there, if you don't mind answering, have you ever shown intense emotion in front of people? Who? In public? What emotion? And why?

Ladies, if you have some stories to share of observing our males counterparts, do share.

10 comments:

  1. One of my ex-boyfriends was quite emotionally soft, but he hated to look like he was crying in front of me. After the first couple of tears, he'd pull it back, but I assume he finished crying when I was gone. (It wasn't me that made him cry, btw!)

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  2. I've written several male characters, in fact sometimes I don't know what the character is going to be until they start talking.

    I'm either quite good at writing male characters, or quite bad but no one's figured it out yet.

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  3. This is a really interesting point for me. Thanks for bringing it up-- I look forward to hearing what different people have to say.

    I am most comfortable writing male characters. I don't tend to come at scenes from an emotional angle, but I'm not sure whether that has anything to do with the gender of my narrator (I write female characters too, after all!). I think it's not too difficult to navigate opposite-gender characters as long as you remember that breaking rules and defying expectation can be a good thing when done well, but those expectations usually demand to be referenced somehow. Writing a really tender and nurturing guy is spicy when he's got a tough/macho profession. Paradoxes make this kind of challenge especially fun.

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  4. I've seen guys in real life do really sweet caring things, then brush it off like its no big deal. I kinda try to do the same when writing fictional guys.

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  5. Wait...men have emotions? Bahahaha just kidding ;)I haven't seen too many men cry...but I don't feel like I've seen THAT many people cry in the first place...it would probably be equal b/w men and women.

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  6. I'm a career counsellor, and men have cried in front of me. Sometimes when recounting the experience of being made redundant, when feeling all is lost and they'll never get a job again, when talking about working so hard to make ends meet that they feel life isn't worth living. When a marriage has broken up because they've been so focused on chasing money rather than putting time in to what matters most. When wondering how they'll manage after finding out their wife has terminal cancer, when recounting the heartache of a child with a disability. It does happen and it's a real privilege to have been trusted enough for the emotion to be shared. The men I've worked with never brush it off like it's irrelevant. Some men have also been bullied at work, they've also cried with the shame, confusion, embarrassment. These aren't metro men either, Some of them have been steel workers, big burly beefy men, they know it's important and don't pretend otherwise. Hope that helps!
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  7. I think they prefer not to show the emotion in front of many people. I think inner turmoil may be more down their street maybe.

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  8. Men seem to display anger pretty readily. It's usually covering a lot of stress. For the most part, I think we're pretty similar. Saving the heart cutting stuff for private and putting on brave faces for public. When we can.

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  9. Men tend to hide emotions that make them look weak.

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  10. Yes, I also think they tend to only reveal their emotions in private moments, keeping up the 'I'm a guy and it's important I appear strong' is essential for their mental stability.

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